I talked to my mom and cousin tonight and gave both of them "my life for the past 3 weeks" in about a one hour conversation. It was a lot for them to take in but they had things to say that were real, wise, loving, and hard. My mom wasn't used to the outpouring of seriousness I laid down at her ears, but she listened and let me say everything, even letting me pause. She never made a sound until she knew I was done and then told me that I had a place at home and that it sounded like I had friends, real friends. She was floored that I thought my Spartanburg family might not take my coming out well, and that if the camp I work at in the summer didn't take me back she was sad for them and wouldn't understand it. She left me with the advice that whatever happens tomorrow (I'm calling it C-Day, coming out day..clever I know) is what is supposed to happen tomorrow. She wondered if I could wrap my head around that idea and I told her I'd try. Actually the more I think of it the more I can understand it. I was surprised that she didn't sympathize with those who weren't understanding.
Gigi, my cousin, said that I had been burned before and that this may happen again, but no matter what I was to give them time, give everyone time. I told her I would give as much time as needed. She shares my worry that its been kept a secret for so long that it might be taken from the position of deceit but even still that there is no backing down.
Tomorrow is C-Day. Tomorrow it will pour when it rains there is no doubt of that.
Interesting quote I read today in one of my daily quotes searches:
"To gain that which is worth having, it may be necessary to lose everything else."
-Burnadette Devlin
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I hope things go well Joey. Call me and let me know what's up. I think your mom is very wise in what she said. It is what it's supposed to be. It's hard but you'll get through.
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